I’ll explain that title in just a minute, since virtually no one outside of my immediate family will understand it. (And they might not remember either…)

So, if you’re ever in Kiev and have the opportunity to visit their Hydropark (or as they pronounce it, HEE-dropark), don’t. Imagine an outdoor amusement park that is waaaaay past its prime; that’s the Hydropark. It’s kind of sad, really. It’s easy to see how it probably once was, but now things look tired and worn out, if not outright broken or overgrown.

Still, going to the Hydropark is a good way to get to the beach. The Dneiper (Dneipro, for our Ukrainian readers; pronounced “knee-pro”) River runs through the middle of Kiev – in fact, it runs through the middle of Ukraine, splitting the country into rather well-defined east and west sections. Based on my three trips to various parts of this country, it seems that Ukrainians are very fond of laying out on their beaches, right in the sun and everything. That’s not exactly my thing — my pasty white skin doesn’t just happen naturally you know… oh wait, I guess it does — but I actually had a good time hanging out at the Dneiper today. It was a tad hot, but a little wading cooled things off. And then a strong south wind kicked up, which I thought felt great.

Weather-wise it has been a little hit and miss. When there’s a little breeze, being out and about n the city is just fine. But the wind has been something of a precursor to storms, and while I love the rain, being in the rain without an umbrella is not fun at all. That’s how my trip to the Lavra ended, with something of a mad dash to a Metro station.

But anyway, back to today, where it did not rain on me. Today I learned two things about my Russian language skills: one, I have a lot more to learn before I will ever be fluent, or even passably awkward, and two, I still have picked up quite a bit and it has been helping tremendously. Even so there are times when #2 is less than ideal. Today, my brain really failed me by not remembering sooner that “zoloti” means “gold” (the color, if not also the metal). And so it wasn’t until I exited the Zoloti Vorota subway station that I realized that I had ended up at one of the places I had wanted to see: Kiev’s Golden Gate. This is the last remaining bit of an old kiev fortress wall, really just a portcullis and some of the surrounding structure. Sadly I arrived too late in the day to get inside – this attraction closes at around 5 – so I just had to settle for some external pictures.

I don’t know if I’ll get back there, but it wouldn’t be hard to make a day of it. The city has been built all around this artifact, so I could easily stroll on over, do a little shopping, have a bite to eat, and then visit a centuries old remnant of Kiev’s past. Granted it can be similarly bad at some American sites as well, but here it is sometimes to the point where if you we’re riding in a taxi and blinked at the wrong time (or, if it was rush hour, had a sneezing fit, which as everyone knows reflexively causes your eyes to close), you could breeze right by something historic.

So about that title… Furr’s Cafeteria was, as you probably guessed, a cafeteria. It was one of the last cafeterias (outside of school) that existed when I was growing up, and it closed up some time after I finished high school. However, it seems that it simply changed names, learned to speak Ukrainian and moved half way around the world. It is now called Puzata Hata (http://www.puzatahata.com.ua/eng/), and it’s a quick and easy way to sample assorted Ukrainian cuisine. Fine cuisine, no, but reasonably authentic. The only real downside is that because these places are pretty popular, it sometimes takes a little while to get checked out and so your food cools off quite a bit. Just like a real cafeteria. Still it was an interesting thing to try. Unlike a normal restaurant, I didn’t have ask for an English menu; I could just go through the line and point at things.

Today I visited Westminster Abbey.

OK, OK, I need a new joke. Kiev is definitely a city of churches, and today was a quick trip to another significant place. The Cathedral of St. Sophia dates to around the recognized founding of the city (1052, I think, although there have been settlements here back to the Stone Age), and while not as extensive as the Lavra, still comprises a few historical buildings. (Both the Lavra and St. Sophia are UNESCO recognized world heritage sites.)

While these places are historical and beautiful and all that, I really don’t care for the touristy nature of them. I’m mean, I’m all in favor of people visiting, but each important building requires separate admission. I can appreciate the cafeteria style of ticketing — why pay 53 UAH general admission, when if you only wanted to see the grounds and the Metropolitan’s Residence, you would only pay 13? Still it kinda sucks.

Prior to hitting st. Sophia’s, I walked across the street (literally) and visited the Church of St. Andrews. No admission required, but it would probably be worth paying if there was. It’s a small church from the Baroque period, but unlike European Baroque styles, this was much more subdued and approachable. Still plenty showy, just not overly so.

The day has been cut a little short, as the aforementioned 90% chance of precipitation became a 100% certainty. But that’s OK. After walking half of Kiev yesterday (I was checking out a map and yikes!), I and my feet don’t mind a more leisurely afternoon.

Just FYI, I am taking plenty of pictures, but I don’t have any way to offload and upload them. That will have to wait until I’m back home, sorry.

Today I went to Westminster Abbey. It’s true. Granted, Ukrainians being who they are, they call their Westminster Abbey something different and keep it in kiev instead of London. But honestly, Holy Assumption Kyivstar-Pechersk Lavra, is pretty much the same thing. If Ukraine had royal weddings they would probably be there.

The Lavra is an old, old church and monastery that has been built up over the years, and has served assorted purposes. In fact, in addition to the main cathedral (Uspensky Cathedral – there must have been a promotion over the years), I counted at least four other churches or chapels. There is also an old hospital, school and library, as well as a couple museums and park-like areas. The school and library are still used, the former for an arts academy (I walked through a garden with assorted sculpture and saw some students working on a dance routine) and the latter is the Ukrainian National Museum of Books. There is a walking tour of their catacombs, which date back to 1051, but that closes at 4 pm. (Eh, maybe tomorrow…)

In the Lavra is also what appears to be a permanent exhibition of micro-miniatures. That was actually pretty impressive. This guy (Siadristy – I had to look that up) back in the late 50s and early 60s was doing painting and sculpture on a very, very small scale. Think chess set on the head of a pin, or a rose sculpted inside a hollowed out human hair — that scale. 10 UAH (a buck and a quarter) well spent. I also ran into a couple Americans there; a couple guys from California and Hawaii doing the tourist thing. So the West Coast is well represented in Kiev this week.

In addition to the Lavra, I also dropped by a couple monuments in one of the city parks. There was also some time spent in Maidan Square, watching some of the Kiev Day events. And there were a couple ride on both their Metro (subway) system and the Kiev funicular. (Here’s where you can read all about this little cable car with the funny name.) The ointmental fly for today was the intense rainstorm that blew through late in the afternoon… and of course I didn’t have my umbrella with me. I will definitely have it tomorrow; the forecast shows a 90% chance of precipitation.

But to end on a high note, the rain ended early so Kiev was still able to shoot off their fireworks. I didn’t have a great view hanging out the apartment window, but the piece I saw was still very nice.

Well, that didn’t work… Apparently getting up before the roosters doesn’t really facilitate airplane sleep, at least not for me. The flight from Portland was fine, except that I was seated next to an elderly gentleman who was just a tad too gassy for any enclosed space. Other than that it went as smoothly as any 10-hour flight should be. But I just couldn’t get any real sleep. I dozen off a couple times but then just ended up doing those “jerk awake” moves, like when you’re falling asleep at school, or in church, or giving that speech to the UN.

So with no good REM sleep to the tally, I was more or less lurching around Schipol airport (in Amsterdam, doncha know) during my layover. Bad thing about Schipol is that there’s really no places to just lie around. I’m glad I only needed to be there for four hours. But on the plus side, I got to have some paprika Pringles again. Some of the flavors other countries have are just awesome. Have you ever had curry Pringles? You should; they are great. These paprika ones weren’t too bad either.

Did I say four hours in Amsterdam? Actually it was a bit longer than that. My flight to Kiev was delayed almost an hour. However because they had to do some seat rearranging after I got my boarding pass (in Portland, no less), I was bumped up to business class. An aisle seat, but even so, comfier seats and better leg room. I don’t know if it was the better seats or fatigue just catching up with me, but I slept nearly the entire flight. The real test as to whether my body knows what time zone it is in comes tomorrow morning, but I’m pretty hopeful at the moment.

Sleeping on the plane wasn’t the only thing that went awry. Nope, not the delay in Amsterdam either. Apparently the last weekend in May is “Kiev Days,” so lots of the downtown area was blocked off — including the street of the apartment I’m renting. The driver tried circling a couple of times, but it was no good. We ended up walking several blocks, against a huge sea of people going the opposite direction, to get to the apartment. The real capper would have been if the elevator was out and we had to walk up six stories, but fortunately we dodged that bullet.

I could tell you a little more about my first few hours in Kiev, but I’m pretty beat right now (yay!) so I’ll add that report next time. I will say that I’m sold on that Portland to Amsterdam flight; in my opinion, it’s the best way to get to Europe.

You know how for some flights you have to get to the airport at some ridiculous hour, which means you have to wake up at an absolutely ludicrous hour to get there in time? Well, that wasn’t me, at least not the first part. My plane wasn’t leaving until the early afternoon, so I have no explanation as to why I was awake at 4:30 this morning…

Still, this abnormal wake up time may work in my favor. Sometimes it’s a bit hard to sleep on a plane, so maybe the yawning I’m doing now will turn into restful snoozing once we’re on our way.

I was hoping for a near empty flight, but as this is Memorial Day weekend, maybe that was too much to expect. ( Best flight I ever had was one from Chicago; I think it was before deregulation, and I would be surprised if there were more than a dozen of us on the plane. Absolutely awesome.)

No question about it… I am going a looong way…

(Of course, this isn’t my first rodeo, so this really isn’t a surprise.)

(Click the pic)

Oy, time goes by fast…

Obviously it has been a gazillion years since I have posted, but there have certainly been plenty of things going on during that time.  The big pieces of this trip have been set for a while — what can I say? I like to get my plans in place early — and it’s just been lots of little things that have been eating up my time.  When I’m not watching television, of course.

I posted previously about my flights, which I think work out really well.  Since I won’t have a stop and layover every few hours like my last trips, I am hoping that I’ll end up sleeping most of the time on the flights and be able to better adjust my body clock to the time zone I’m heading to.  I’m keeping my fingers crossed.

While in Kiev, I’ll be staying in what looks to be a pretty nice apartment.  (For those keeping score, this is the second time I’ve gone the apartment route; only one for hotels/motels.)  I found it online at kievapts.com — here’s a link to it.  It looks and sounds great online, and is located near (but not right in) a key area of the city.

Let you think I’m crazy for picking an apartment online and sight unseen, I will refer you to the apartment I rented in Odessa during my first trip.  That turned out to be an awesome place, and the online pictures and description did not lie.  True, this is a different company, so it remains something of a gamble.  Still, since a lot of the economy in Kiev (and Ukraine in general) thrives on tourism, these rental companies know that a few bad reviews can put them out of business.  People may not always say it when things are good, but you can be sure they’ll speak out when things are bad.

It’s official — I’ll be visiting Ukraine again this year! I’ve just purchased my tickets, and will begin hammering out the details of lodging and getting around in-country. I’ve got time for all this; my trip is still a couple months away. (These overseas trips take a bit if time to put together, doncha know.)

For the first time, I’ll be taking the nonstop Portland to Amsterdam flight. This should be interesting; no stops along the way, so only two flights to get to Kiev.

Something I’ve been asked — both directly and tacitly — is how I can manage to get around in a country where I don’t know the language.  (Actually, I don’t know either language, which isn’t necessarily doubly hard, but it’s not half as easy either.)  The truth is that it is really not as bad as you would think.

A little dab will do ya
While I would love to have a full command of the Russian language — and if I get a little more diligent about using my Rosetta Stone software, that may someday be the case — knowing a few of the basics really helps a lot.  One of the most helpful things I did was to learn the Russian alphabet.  Even though we learn to speak English before we learn the alphabet, I wanted to be able to “read” (or at least sound out) the words being presented in my various learning tools.  I could have just stuck with learning things by ear, but I’m really glad I took the time upfront to learn the alphabet.

You’d be surprised how many similar words exist between English and Russian.  For example, “salad,” which in Russian is spelled “салат.”  This looks funny, but actually sounds like “shallot,” but with an “s” instead of an “sh.”  In other words, it almost sounds like “salad.”  Same thing for “soup” – “суп,” which is pronounced exactly the same way.  Moon is луна (“luna”), and just like everywhere else in the world, OK is “OK.”  So being able to read (however slowly) words often helped out a lot.

What helped even more, though, is knowing some key words and phrases, namely “please” and “thank you.”  A few others don’t hurt either, like “hello,” “good-bye” and “excuse me.”  I think it’s a truism for everywhere, but being polite can help defuse many a situation.  Plus I’ve heard — and this seems to be true — that people are more accepting of you and your failings if they at least see that you are trying to use their language, follow their customs, etc.  A huge goal for both of my trips was not to come off an an “ugly American,” and I think I did pretty well in that regard.

It also really helped that nearly everyone in Ukraine knows a little English; it is actually a required subject in schools these days.  Even so, you can’t expect a lot.  Imagine if you took a half-year of Spanish in the fourth or fifth grade, and then fifteen years later you were trying to communicate with a Spanish speaker.  How well do you think you’d fare?  Well, it’s about the same for most Ukrainians.  Plus with out of the way places like Mariupol, there just isn’t a lot of English-speaking traffic coming through, so people are definitely a little rusty but they are willing to try.

It’s in there somewhere
Something I noticed last year is that all my foreign language learning appears to get crammed into one part of my brain.  I came to this conclusion after, time and again, needing to say something and having the wrong language pop out of my mouth.  You’d think that language would be English, but as often as not it was Italian or German — and I don’t even speak those languages.  Apparently a little learning truly is a dangerous thing.  Still, it was rather amusing to be in a situation where I needed to say “excuse me” (in Russian, “извините”) and having the Italian “scusi” pop out.  Or when asking for water (“вода”) and saying “wasser” instead.  I’m really surprised I didn’t dredge up more Spanish; I think I know a little more of than and I hear it a lot more often.

This year was a lot better.  Maybe I’ve learned enough Russian to make my brain set up a foreign language annex.  This year, when I needed to say извините, I actually said извините.  For some of these basic words, I don’t believe I even had to think of what I wanted to say in English first and then come up with the Russian word.  Of course, “excuse me” (извините) is something I tended to say a lot, so maybe that’s not a good example.  Even so, things were definitely a bit easier this time around.

There were some times when I screwed up, of course.  I know there were a couple times when I said “I know” (Я знаю – “ya znaiyoo”) when I actually meant “I understand” (Я понимаю – “ya panamaiyoo”).  Sure, a simple and understandable mistake, but still two different meanings.  I don’t think I screwed up at any critical point — saying “I know” and coming across like a know-it-all — but I’d prefer not to make those silly mistakes.  (In case you’re wondering, the backwards R is pronounced “ya,” and when it’s all alone like it is above, it means “I” or “I am.”  Here endth the lesson.)

“My hovercraft is full of eels”
(Bonus points for anyone who gets the witty and clever reference of this subtitle.)

Phrasebooks are useless.  There; I’ve said it.  Oh sure, they can help you learn a phrase, but what happens then?  Unless it’s a declarative statement (“I don’t speak Russian”), more than likely you’re going to get a response and your guidebook is not going to help you with that, now is it?

This occurred to me when I was using this nifty little app I had picked up for my iPod.  Don’t get me wrong; it’s a great app.  Lots of words and phrases, and if you select one, it will be spoken by a native speaker.  (If you hold your finger down, it will be spoken slowly.)  So it is useful for learning phrases, but unless you know what is being said in response, you’re still out of luck.  It’s great to be able to ask — either by myself or through my app — “Where’s the park?,” but if the respondent says “север” instead of pointing or taking me to the park, I’m just going to be wandering around.  (“север” means north.)

Avast, ye!  A squall!
The main thing that helps with getting around in a foreign country where you don’t know the language, is going to a foreign country where people are generally nice and want to be helpful.  I mentioned elsewhere about the two ladies on the bus who wanted to make sure I didn’t lose anything from my bag; that’s a good example of how people are.  In restaurants, the staff was often quite apologetic when they didn’t have an English version of their menu.  I think it helped that I would ask about the menu in Russian; they could see I was trying, and I really think they wanted to help if they could.

The only time I had any real trouble was one day in a park.  I was sitting on bench with my book and an old man came by begging for “spare change.”  (That’s such a curious phrase.) (Also, I don’t think I saw anyone begging last year, but this time, I saw about one person each day.  Maybe the economy is getting worse over there.)  I used my usual phrases — “Sorry/excuse me,” “I don’t understand” and “I don’t speak Russian” — but I think my accent was confusing him; I had to repeat my self a couple times.  Then I made the mistake of saying “Я американец” — “I am an American” — and this seemed to set him off.  He wasn’t yelling or anything, but he seemed really pissed.  I wish I’d said “I’m a tourist” (“Я турист”) instead, although I don’t know if that would have helped.  It seemed the situation wasn’t getting any better, so I got up, said (in English) “I’m sorry, I’ve clearly upset you, so I’m going to leave now” and I left.

That was really the only bad encounter; most of the time things went much better, even when there was a little difficulty.  On my last day there, I went to the supermarket to get some candy to bring back, and the clerk at the checkout seemed amused by my attempts at Russian.  (Again, it was probably the accent.  And, like I said, Mariupol doesn’t see a lot of English speakers.)  Most encounters were more like that:  a little rough around the edges, but overall fine for everyone.

Repeat after me

• I met with a translator a couple of times during my first days there — just a few bucks and definitely worth it — and one of the things I did was “try out” some of the phrases I expected to be using while I was there.  One of the hard things in Russian (OK, one of the MANY hard things) is knowing which syllable in a word gets the stress, but to be fair, English isn’t that much better.  Mostly, I wanted to make sure that, even with my American accent (and yes, there is such a thing), I was pronouncing things correctly and would be understood.  One of the phrases I was using was “I do not speak Russian.”  (I had cobbled it together last year, but I had the wrong form of “to speak,” so I probably sounded like a moron.)  Apparently I can say that phrase quite well (yea for me!), and my translator found it very funny that I was saying that I couldn’t speak Russian in relatively good Russian.  Kind of like saying “I’m not an actor, but I play one on TV.”
• Something else I’m glad I learned before this trip was numbers; I wish I’d know them last year.  I think in the 2011 blog I mentioned one encounter with a cashier who was a little perturbed at me for not understanding her when she was telling me the amount owed.  (After a couple tries, she keyed the amount into a calculator and showed me.  After that I tended to go to places with cash registers.)  I’m still a little hazy on 50 and above (though eventually I get it), but I can easily count up to 49.  In fact, when I would walk from the Port of Portland office to the terminal to get lunch, I would count my steps in Russian.  That repetition really helped, although it took a little while to get the cadence quite right; Russian numbers have a different number of syllables.