One of my problems with Russian (and I am sure I have many, many problems) is that there are words that sound very similar to my Western ear. In fact, one of my first frustrations with the Rosetta Stone language software I’d purchased was it’s inability to distinguish my pronunciation of “mushina” (man) and “mashina” (car), even when overemphasing the differences. But it’s not just the pronunciation of the words that is at issue; it’s the fact that they are so similar that I will often get them confused.

Colors is a good example. In English, green, gold and yellow all sound quite different. But in Russian, they are close enough to always screw me up. Green is “zeloni,” gold is “zoloti,” and yellow is “zholti.” It does not seem so bad at the moment, when I’m just sitting here typing things out, but trying to get the right color when I’m also fumbling around for a half dozen other words is a recipe for disaster.

I’ve even got one of these potential mix-ups now that I’m married. As I’ve mentioned elsewhere, my wife’s son is named Zhenya (Женя), and I’ve been hearing and/or saying “Zhenya” for the past couple years. Now that I’m married I have a wife, or in Russian, “gena” (гена). It’s basically the same word, just with the first and last sounds softened in one of them. But given that my mouth has gotten somewhat used to one of them, I always need to think and/or pause a moment before I try whisper some sweet nothing into my wife’s ear.

And it’s one of those sweet nothings that prompts this post. The words for “beautiful” and “red” are pretty close to each other — “krasnaya” versus “krasni.” I’m pretty sure that more than once I’ve been waiting on the corner for the beautiful light to turn green (zholti? zoloti? nyet, zeloni). But this red/beautiful slip of the tongue actually has a funny meaning this week. The apartment owner had obviously just purchased some new bed sheets before we moved in. They are nice sheets in a red, floral design… and apparently not color-fast. They also hadn’t been washed before being set out for our use. As a result after a couple days, we started to notice red on our clothes and hands and elsewhere. It washes off pretty easily, but it’s still a hassle. So for the moment at least, if I accidentally say my wife is red, I’ve got some cover beyond just being a doofus.